Sunday, November 12, 2006

From the Sublime to the Ridiculous

…Or at least from the intelligent to the stupid.

NPR: Week in Review, Elections, Rumsfeld

NBC: Couple sees Virgin Mary, Jesus in Gold Nugget

This little nugget was carried as straight news by a bazillion NBC affiliates. It is alleged to be an image of the alleged virgin Mary holding the Baby Jeezus, found in a naturally occurring gold nugget. Why the fuck is it always the alleged virgin Mary? Why can’t it be any of about three billion other women with a baby? That high forehead and vertical profile looks sort of Irish to me. What, there aren’t any Irish women with babies? Is that a flower in her hair? I don’t remember the Bible mentioning any Polynesian habits in ancient Jerusalem. That Jaw kinda looks like the Tinman from The Wizard of Oz, or maybe like Sigmund Freud’s under the beard. Are you trying to say that the alleged Sexless Baby Blaster was a leper? If you see a profile at all, you see a clearly defined nose and lower jaw. Ya-sef’s pregnant bride would not have risked her life in public by not covering her face. Are you trying to say that the alleged virgin Mary was an unchaste slut? On second thought, it looks more like a gold-plated loogie that somebody hocked up into a deep fryer. Yeah, I can see some yokel fishing that out of the Fryolator along with the Twinkies and Coca-cola.

Would somebody please discover another habitable planet? I need to move away from this loony rock.

PS: The alleged Baby Jesus looks more like a baby Dr. Zoidberg to me.


At 3:20 PM, Blogger tn said...

I know what you mean. It's like the whole planet is a free-form sanitarium. Get us off this crazy thing!

At 8:58 AM, Blogger Laura Elizabeth said...

There is intelligent life in the universe.

We are its insane asylum.

I think that thing looks like a lion about to eat something.

At 9:37 AM, Blogger JanieBelle said...

I thought it looked more like a polar bear about to eat a baby.

Welcome to the jungle, baby.

At 8:34 AM, Blogger Kristine said...

Whatever it looks like (a Homo habilis mother cradling her baby?), the whole concept is iron pyrite!

At 6:49 PM, Blogger Kalanchoe542 said...

I almost hesitate to say this, but since nothing usually stops me from spewing freely, I would say that this natural sculpture looks more like what emerged from my dog following her consumption of a yellow crayon. Very decorative!

At 2:06 PM, Blogger beepbeepitsme said...

Hahaha I love Futurama.

Certainly peoples who are not familiar with the jesus story do not see mary and the baby jesus. This should tell people something.

I would suggest that ancient egyptians might see Isis and Horus, or some other configuration.

People literally interpret shapes to be consistent with their cultural paradigm.

At 3:26 PM, Blogger concerned citizen said...

It's the thought that counts. I bet that thing is worth it's weight in gold.

At 11:51 PM, Blogger Delta said...

It looks like a bird sitting in a nest to me.

This reminds me of the Virgin Mary spotting post I did back in March.

At 9:13 AM, Blogger breakerslion said...

Drunken Tune and Laura Elizabeth:

I used to think along those lines, but that would mean that the Scientologists might be on to something. Of course, the Great Xenu would be nothing more than a Social Worker. That would make Scientology the loony bin equivalent of the Cargo Cult... hmmm..... Nah!

Janiebelle, Kristine, Kalanchoe542: I promise not to draw any Rorschach conclusions from your descriptions :-)

You too Delta, you posted as I was writing this. I read that post and enjoyed it thoroughly. I would have left a bawdy comment about what I thought the bridge stain looked like, but I had already done so elsewhere.

Beepbeepitsme, l>t:
People really do see and hear what they want to see and hear, don't they? When I think of Isis, I think of Joanna Cammeron in that skimpy outfit, so I don't see the resemblance, but the ancients might. I refuse to date myself beyond the last century :-)

At 9:45 AM, Blogger breakerslion said...

That's Joanna Cameron. Typo.

At 12:35 AM, Blogger Rev. Barky said...

Read the Wwiki entry about this phenomenon here:


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