Saturday, April 15, 2006

Holiday Fun

A challenge to all Pagans:

If you start organizing now, by next Easter you could be ready to stage huge protests over the insensitive mockery of your fertility symbols by the Christians. How long will you sit idly by as they boil eggs into infertility? How can you not be outraged by their ritualistic killing and devouring of rabbits, insuring that they cannot multiply? The Muslims have shown us the way! Take to the streets and threaten mayhem until the Christians stop this centuries-old insensitivity! What are a few cartoons compared to the millions of chicken eggs turned into gastric time bombs each year? When will the ritual slaughter of defenseless candy cottontails end? Join the War on Easter, and together we can embarrass the enemy!

You might say to yourself, “This is the Atheist’s war, and none of my business.” Just remember the words of Martinus of Neimoll:

“When they came for the Dionysians I did not speak because I was not a Dionysian. When they came for the Apollonians I did not speak because I was not an Apollonian. When they came for the Druids, I did not speak because I was not a Druid. When they came for the Vallar, there was no one left to speak.”

The enemy is weak. They are still reeling from their loss on the cartoon front. If we attack now, we can keep them on the run. I smell lamb chops!

With acknowledgment to Martin Neimoller for his timeless quote.


At 3:47 AM, Blogger BEAST FCD said...

Whipping bunnies, bleeding jesuses.....

These lunatics keep raving about violent on TV screens, devilish advocates in Hollywood, but......

When it comes to insinuating religious violence, they wouldn't hesistate to put it up for all and sunder.

Bloody hypocrites. Check out my BDSM article on this issue.

At 8:14 PM, Blogger Aaron Kinney said...

I love that image! :)

At 8:03 PM, Blogger Darius said...

But they're plastic eggs and chocolate rabbits. That's what makes the holiday Christian rather than pagan.

At 5:50 PM, Blogger breakerslion said...

Darius, I think you're confused. I don't see anyone nailing any real crucified bodies on their wall either. It's a symbol.

You make a good argument for marketing chocolate crucifixes though... maybe chocolate babies for Christmas? Hey, why should one form of ritual cannibalism (communion) be enough?


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